The Incredible, Edible....HotDog?

Well, it has been a while since I posted. I do apologize but it really has been ridiculously busy. I know, I know excuses, excuses. Launch, landing, launch has provided me with not only enough overtime to take a month off but also enough aggravation to necessitate me to do so. Unfortunately, I don't get to do so. So, instead I must amuse myself with the surrounding wonders of Brevard County. Yea, sure. First off, I must discuss the sad recent development that has encompassed the community of Melbourne and her surrounding towns. A local hero of sorts has disappointed bikers, bike builders and people of all sorts with an incredible display of poor judgment. Billy Lane, renowned bike builder and owner of Choppers Inc. (located in Melbourne on US1) drove drunk the night of September 4th and killed a 56 year old man on a moped. Billy spent all day at Coconuts drinking and partying, then ventured over to Cheaters to bring in the evening with more drinks and fun. Well, fun was the last thing that night ended with. His blood alcohol level was .192, more than twice the legal limit! The fact that he could function, much less drive a car is unbelievable. While driving his Dodge Ram truck down A1A (a 2 lane, double yellow lined road that parallels the beachside) he decided it would be a great idea to veer into the southbound lane and cross the double yellowed line in order to pass some cars. Well, the poor guy on the moped didn't even know what hit him. Billy hit the moped head on, killing the man and sending him 64 ft from the crash site. Then the truck rolled off the road, knocked over several palm trees and ended up hitting a pole. He not only killed this man, injured his passenger but then had the nerve to refuse a breathalyzer and blood test at the hospital. A slew of FHP had to hold him down in order to get a sample. Billy Lane turned himself in yesterday and was charged and released on $15,000 bond. You can read a full article on Florida Today. To say I am disappointed is an understatement. It saddens me because every time I had ever met or talked with Billy Lane he was always the most real down to earth guy who you could really respect for his intelligence (he is a college graduate in Engineering), work ethic and initiative for making his small business into a national sensation. But now I feel I have been decieved and I hope he gets what he deserves. This is not his first alcohol related offense either. North Carolina has him coming in on DUI and refusing breathalyzer charges on Oct. 5. He had everything and everything going for him. To drive drunk, not take a cab, and risk harm to anyone or anything to me is just selfish. He took a human life and there is no excuse for that.

On a lighter note, I have a completely entertaining story to tell. Alright, at least I find it entertaining. You know the famous Nathan Hot Dog eating contest in which Takeru Kobayashi of Japan wins by eating a ridiculous amount of dogs, something like 53......well, it seems every year after the contest people get brave or at least start talking a lot of trash on the subject about how they can eat this many pizzas in 12 minutes, or saltines in a minute. It just so happens, the boys (and I use that term literally) that I work with have such bravado to believe that they can accomplish these amazing feats of moronacy (I don't care if it is not a real word) and reign the champion of the ROCC, for at least the time being.
September 15th, a Friday that will go down in the history books, along side Muhammad Ali and George Washington, a young man named Johnny D. will be an American hero. Or at least a ROCC hero, heck he isn’t even that, he is the kid who will eat anything, and that is what he will be know as. After the contest aired, the machismo started flowing and a bet was posed. It was said John couldn’t eat 10 hotdogs in an hour. Well, game on. With no hotdogs immediately on hand, saltines became the alternative and it had to be 7 in a minute. He tackled that with no problem however, the hotdogs fell to the wayside until that fateful Friday. Now, let me preempt this by saying this is my place of employment where this is taking place. Diana, my boss(!!!), decides she wants to get in on this bet and actually brings in the hotdogs for Johnny D to eat. I could hardly believe it myself. So, the crowd gathers and the eating commences. Micro waved hotdogs and stale buns make for a great lunch and Johnny commanded the first 4 down. A little break and the next 4 went down but those last 2 were seriously eluding him. He thought a little mustard might make the now repulsive stench of hotdog dissipate and that perhaps a Dr. Pepper might make it wash down faster. With the crowd chanting things such as “mmmm, cow butt” and “you know you are eating tongue and lips”, he manages to scarf 1 ½ more before he inevitable turns a little peeked and taps out. 9 ½ hotdogs!!! He was so close and he knew it but all the lip, tongue and butt talk was about to get the best of him. He takes a mere 8-10 steps toward the door (and bathroom) before regurgitated hotdogs made their final appearance. All over the console room carpet laid the remains of one bravely stupid boy’s attempt at greatness. Hilarious, he is 33 years old, with a Master’s Degree in Math, who has the responsibility of launching rockets for crying out loud! Well, look at him. Who really does these kinds of things, at work no less?!!? The real tragedy of this entire story is that I did not get to attend the festivities because the one day I take off the best thing to happen at work in a long time happens! How is that for being born under a bad sign?